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[ His glass full, he didn't hesitate to take a rather large and indelicate drink from it. The goal was to numb it all, not to forget it but to at least make it tolerable. ]
He did, he really did.
[ God, what a mess, another deep pull from the drink in his hand before setting the now empty glass down. Pacing himself? Who cared about that right now, it wasn't necessary. ]
You know, I was happy that we were all back together again too and now...
[ There was something of a frustrated snort as he shoved the glass back in Abbacchio's direction. ]
...now I feel like it's all the same shit, not knowing if one of us is just going to, you know.
[ He didn't like it, he didn't like the idea that he might lose Abbacchio again too. Keep it together, Mista, keep it together. ]
I should have tried harder, I should have gotten a job like I was supposed to so that we could've gotten the house we all talked about when we first got here. Maybe if I'd tried harder...this wouldn't be happening again...
[ It didn't matter that Abbacchio hadn't been here when they'd talked about getting a house. He'd been included in there somewhere, the idea that if the others could come back so could he.
He was supposed to help protect them all and he'd failed more than anyone else; that sting in his eyes nagging at him even more. ]
Fuck!
He did, he really did.
[ God, what a mess, another deep pull from the drink in his hand before setting the now empty glass down. Pacing himself? Who cared about that right now, it wasn't necessary. ]
You know, I was happy that we were all back together again too and now...
[ There was something of a frustrated snort as he shoved the glass back in Abbacchio's direction. ]
...now I feel like it's all the same shit, not knowing if one of us is just going to, you know.
[ He didn't like it, he didn't like the idea that he might lose Abbacchio again too. Keep it together, Mista, keep it together. ]
I should have tried harder, I should have gotten a job like I was supposed to so that we could've gotten the house we all talked about when we first got here. Maybe if I'd tried harder...this wouldn't be happening again...
[ It didn't matter that Abbacchio hadn't been here when they'd talked about getting a house. He'd been included in there somewhere, the idea that if the others could come back so could he.
He was supposed to help protect them all and he'd failed more than anyone else; that sting in his eyes nagging at him even more. ]
Fuck!
[ this could be a good idea or it could be a stupid idea, he honestly doesn't know how mista's doing right now
he just saw an opportunity on his way home and thought it might be a nice way to lift mista's spirits maybe
also, he wants to see if the guy is doing okay and be there for him if necessary ]
hey man... can i come over?
he just saw an opportunity on his way home and thought it might be a nice way to lift mista's spirits maybe
also, he wants to see if the guy is doing okay and be there for him if necessary ]
hey man... can i come over?
The rest of us got here a month before you did, we were all adjusting so I don't think it ever came up again. We were gonna get a house for us all to share, you know? So we could keep an eye on each other...
[ He was in the middle of refilling his own glass when those final words hit his ears, his hand trembling slightly before he set the bottle down. No matter what anyone said, he knew better; he'd let him get too close... ]
I think it was my fault, I hesitated...I should have been paying more attention but I was worried about the bullets on the ground. There were f-four of them and I was trying to get Trish to drop another one and then he was just...
[ He could feel his throat tensing as he spoke, his chest tightening as he shakily took up his glass and downed the contents. What he wanted was something stronger, but he would take what he could get. Did he really deserve anything good after everything that had happened? After he'd failed?
He didn't even care that he couldn't hold back the tears any longer, reaching for the bottle again and trying to pour himself yet another drink. He hadn't realised it, that he was carrying this around with him and somehow that made it hurt more. ]
[ He was in the middle of refilling his own glass when those final words hit his ears, his hand trembling slightly before he set the bottle down. No matter what anyone said, he knew better; he'd let him get too close... ]
I think it was my fault, I hesitated...I should have been paying more attention but I was worried about the bullets on the ground. There were f-four of them and I was trying to get Trish to drop another one and then he was just...
[ He could feel his throat tensing as he spoke, his chest tightening as he shakily took up his glass and downed the contents. What he wanted was something stronger, but he would take what he could get. Did he really deserve anything good after everything that had happened? After he'd failed?
He didn't even care that he couldn't hold back the tears any longer, reaching for the bottle again and trying to pour himself yet another drink. He hadn't realised it, that he was carrying this around with him and somehow that made it hurt more. ]
yeah i'm not normally so temperamental
it's just sanguis could be a hard time no matter how long you're here
no, i insist
you really wanted it and then i went ahead and told you i wasn't going to give you any
i honestly make cakes very regularly so it's really not a big deal
if you'd like me to visit or meet up somewhere i can give you one of the cakes i baked today
it's just sanguis could be a hard time no matter how long you're here
no, i insist
you really wanted it and then i went ahead and told you i wasn't going to give you any
i honestly make cakes very regularly so it's really not a big deal
if you'd like me to visit or meet up somewhere i can give you one of the cakes i baked today
[ Abbacchio taking his hand came as something of a surprise, Mista first just glancing in his direction before looking at him full on. He couldn't even pretend like he wasn't crying, like he was severely emotionally compromised. ]
I was supposed to be watching, making sure that no one got close! How the fuck is that not my fault?! It doesn't matter whether he could jump around in time or not, I fucked up. Me!
[ His free hand came up to hit against his own chest with a hollow thump, Mista now a full on emotional mess. He was making a scene and he didn't really care. ]
...and we'll never know if he'd blame me or anyone else because I was too much of a fucking coward to tell him what happened. I understood why when we first got here, but after Bucciarati...
[ He stopped himself there for a moment, sucking in a breath before letting out something of a bitter laugh and squeezing Abbacchio's hand. ]
...I should have thought it was a possibility, I should have told him what he might be going back to.
[ What. A. Fucking. Mess. ]
I was supposed to be watching, making sure that no one got close! How the fuck is that not my fault?! It doesn't matter whether he could jump around in time or not, I fucked up. Me!
[ His free hand came up to hit against his own chest with a hollow thump, Mista now a full on emotional mess. He was making a scene and he didn't really care. ]
...and we'll never know if he'd blame me or anyone else because I was too much of a fucking coward to tell him what happened. I understood why when we first got here, but after Bucciarati...
[ He stopped himself there for a moment, sucking in a breath before letting out something of a bitter laugh and squeezing Abbacchio's hand. ]
...I should have thought it was a possibility, I should have told him what he might be going back to.
[ What. A. Fucking. Mess. ]
[ Was he still struggling? Yes, most definitely. Had he been drunk more than a few times since finding out that Narancia was gone and having a meltdown in front of Abbacchio? Yeah, tick the box on that one too.
The message coming through took him a moment, Mista fumbling with his answer. Josuke. He was good people. He was really good people. ]
heyyy
yeah man
come over it's good
The message coming through took him a moment, Mista fumbling with his answer. Josuke. He was good people. He was really good people. ]
heyyy
yeah man
come over it's good
[ Despite the fact that his mind was still trying to convince him otherwise, even Mista couldn't really argue with that logic. Or maybe it was that he didn't want to. He was angry and he felt like a stupid baby for crying like this in front of Abbacchio, but who else could he really talk to anyway? Who else would understand? Would anyone?
Spoilers, Mista, lots of people would understand. That wasn't important, though, not as important as pulling his hand away from the other man and pulling him into a rather tear-soaked embrace. ]
...please don't leave me here by myself, I think you're the only one I have left.
[ There was a heavy pause, no concern about whether this hug was too long or whether it was appropriate. There was something else eating away at the back of his mind. Even as he thought about it he worried his lower lip between his teeth. ]
I don't think Giorno is ever coming out of that crystal, I know it probably doesn't matter to you but it matters to me.
Spoilers, Mista, lots of people would understand. That wasn't important, though, not as important as pulling his hand away from the other man and pulling him into a rather tear-soaked embrace. ]
...please don't leave me here by myself, I think you're the only one I have left.
[ There was a heavy pause, no concern about whether this hug was too long or whether it was appropriate. There was something else eating away at the back of his mind. Even as he thought about it he worried his lower lip between his teeth. ]
I don't think Giorno is ever coming out of that crystal, I know it probably doesn't matter to you but it matters to me.
Like hell I'm gonna wish something like that, not ever.
[ There was absolutely no containing himself after that, arms tightening around him even more as he finally let out a sob that he'd been holding back. ]
And I swear, I'm not gonna...
[ Oh god, how awful. Was he hiccuping? ]
...I'm not gonna go anywhere, I...fuck, what am I supposed to do now?
[ He'd been trying to live something of a normal life here, something that he hadn't really gotten to do back up but it was getting really damn difficult to even pretend that things were fine and that he was getting by. ]
[ There was absolutely no containing himself after that, arms tightening around him even more as he finally let out a sob that he'd been holding back. ]
And I swear, I'm not gonna...
[ Oh god, how awful. Was he hiccuping? ]
...I'm not gonna go anywhere, I...fuck, what am I supposed to do now?
[ He'd been trying to live something of a normal life here, something that he hadn't really gotten to do back up but it was getting really damn difficult to even pretend that things were fine and that he was getting by. ]
you're bringing it
i'm sure it's good
yeah
[ Thankfully Mista wasn’t nearly as intoxicated as he had been the day before, though he did have to roll himself off the couch to answer the door. A pause before he opened it, pulling his hand back through his hair and taking in a breath.
He hadn't seen him since that day at the convention, the second time that things had gotten a little out of control. He didn't regret it, though, he'd enjoyed the contact but there was still a great deal of confusion regarding exactly how he felt. That was all in the back of his mind, a few seconds of heated thoughts before he tried to focus on the door. The task at hand.
Don't focus on why you've been drinking and wallowing, Mista, just the fact that you have been. And with that he swung open the door, leaning against the frame and offering something of a wave. ]
Hey man, so what is it?
[ That lean in, peering at the box with a squint. Why did he get him a thing? ]
i'm sure it's good
yeah
[ Thankfully Mista wasn’t nearly as intoxicated as he had been the day before, though he did have to roll himself off the couch to answer the door. A pause before he opened it, pulling his hand back through his hair and taking in a breath.
He hadn't seen him since that day at the convention, the second time that things had gotten a little out of control. He didn't regret it, though, he'd enjoyed the contact but there was still a great deal of confusion regarding exactly how he felt. That was all in the back of his mind, a few seconds of heated thoughts before he tried to focus on the door. The task at hand.
Don't focus on why you've been drinking and wallowing, Mista, just the fact that you have been. And with that he swung open the door, leaning against the frame and offering something of a wave. ]
Hey man, so what is it?
[ That lean in, peering at the box with a squint. Why did he get him a thing? ]
[ He wasn't ready to let go, even if he did feel like he needed to wipe at his face like a sleepy child. Instead, he just rested there with his arms around Abbacchio and his chin propped on his shoulder. ]
If you figure it out first, don't forget to let me know, yeah?
[ He still felt empty on the inside, he thought of the word 'hollow' but that just made him think of Narancia again and what Giorno had said. It was a thought that was pushed to the back of his mind, shifting to rest his forehead on his shoulder as his grip loosened. ]
It's okay if I stay like this for a little, right?
If you figure it out first, don't forget to let me know, yeah?
[ He still felt empty on the inside, he thought of the word 'hollow' but that just made him think of Narancia again and what Giorno had said. It was a thought that was pushed to the back of his mind, shifting to rest his forehead on his shoulder as his grip loosened. ]
It's okay if I stay like this for a little, right?
[ Honestly, while their last meeting is still on his mind, their odd tension takes a backseat to the genuine concern he has for his friend. It sounded like Mista had taken the news very baldly, and for a completely valid reason too. If Josuke himself is sad about what happened to Narancia, what more someone who's probably one of Narancia's best friends from home? He's here to lend a listening here if needed, and even if not, he hopes he can cheer him up with this stupid idea he has.
Now that he's actually here, though, he's starting to feel a bit nervous about it, because it might be the dumbest thing Mista's ever heard of. Josuke steps in, putting the box on the table and opening it. Inside, there's a dollhouse! ]
Dude, don't laugh at me for this --Fine, guess it is kinda stupid, so I won't stop you from laughing.
[ He's feeling slightly embarrassed and mostly really stupid for having this idea at all, and self-depreciation is how he lessens the blow for himself. ]
I just thought ... it'd be cool if the pistols had their own crib. And one of the toy stores were just going to throw this away when it broke. [ Thankfully Josuke has the ability to fix pretty much anything. He also picked up some cheap dollhouse furniture to make the place look more roomy. ]
Now that he's actually here, though, he's starting to feel a bit nervous about it, because it might be the dumbest thing Mista's ever heard of. Josuke steps in, putting the box on the table and opening it. Inside, there's a dollhouse! ]
Dude, don't laugh at me for this --Fine, guess it is kinda stupid, so I won't stop you from laughing.
[ He's feeling slightly embarrassed and mostly really stupid for having this idea at all, and self-depreciation is how he lessens the blow for himself. ]
I just thought ... it'd be cool if the pistols had their own crib. And one of the toy stores were just going to throw this away when it broke. [ Thankfully Josuke has the ability to fix pretty much anything. He also picked up some cheap dollhouse furniture to make the place look more roomy. ]
[ Mista watched with absolute curiosity, leaning in to see what was in the box and staring once he realised what it was.
Oh shit. Oh fuck. Oh. OH. OH!!! Any tension that he was concerned about was non-existent when he pulled him into that hug with a broad smile on his face. ]
No way, man, this is sweet! Like, holy shit, why didn't I think about getting one of these before?
[ He was laughing, but it was actually joyful without a hint of spite. He liked it, he really liked it. He pulled away from that hug and the dollhouse was removed from the box, he began to first peek in through the windows and then through the open side of the dollhouse. ]
There's a room for all of them! Damn, dude, this is so cool!
Oh shit. Oh fuck. Oh. OH. OH!!! Any tension that he was concerned about was non-existent when he pulled him into that hug with a broad smile on his face. ]
No way, man, this is sweet! Like, holy shit, why didn't I think about getting one of these before?
[ He was laughing, but it was actually joyful without a hint of spite. He liked it, he really liked it. He pulled away from that hug and the dollhouse was removed from the box, he began to first peek in through the windows and then through the open side of the dollhouse. ]
There's a room for all of them! Damn, dude, this is so cool!
[ It warms his young heart to see a close friend so delighted about his gift. Josuke swells up with some pride now, feeling accomplished because he managed to cheer Mista up a little (at least, he's hoping so). And to think, a part of him was afraid Mista would see the whole thing as a joke. ]
Yeah? You think so? It'd be cute as hell seeing them running around the place and doing whatever! I don't really know what they're gonna do inside the plastic kitchen though ...
[ But seeing a pistol opening a tiny fridge also sounds cute as fuck, and that's all that matters. ] I'm ... glad to see you happy. [ Now that's a little embarrassing to say, even if he's sincere about it. Rubbing at the back of his neck, Josuke flushes very slightly. ]
Yeah? You think so? It'd be cute as hell seeing them running around the place and doing whatever! I don't really know what they're gonna do inside the plastic kitchen though ...
[ But seeing a pistol opening a tiny fridge also sounds cute as fuck, and that's all that matters. ] I'm ... glad to see you happy. [ Now that's a little embarrassing to say, even if he's sincere about it. Rubbing at the back of his neck, Josuke flushes very slightly. ]
[ Even if he was still pretty comfortable with his chin resting on the other man's shoulder, he nodded just a little and let out a thoughtful hum. ]
Yeah, lots of 'em...
[ He knew that right now the chroma was boosting his mood, that things would be fine for the moment but what was it going to be like once he got home? Once he was alone again? That wasn't something he needed to think about right now. ]
Yeah, lots of 'em...
[ He knew that right now the chroma was boosting his mood, that things would be fine for the moment but what was it going to be like once he got home? Once he was alone again? That wasn't something he needed to think about right now. ]
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