[ Despite the fact that his mind was still trying to convince him otherwise, even Mista couldn't really argue with that logic. Or maybe it was that he didn't want to. He was angry and he felt like a stupid baby for crying like this in front of Abbacchio, but who else could he really talk to anyway? Who else would understand? Would anyone?
Spoilers, Mista, lots of people would understand. That wasn't important, though, not as important as pulling his hand away from the other man and pulling him into a rather tear-soaked embrace. ]
...please don't leave me here by myself, I think you're the only one I have left.
[ There was a heavy pause, no concern about whether this hug was too long or whether it was appropriate. There was something else eating away at the back of his mind. Even as he thought about it he worried his lower lip between his teeth. ]
I don't think Giorno is ever coming out of that crystal, I know it probably doesn't matter to you but it matters to me.
[For a second, Abbacchio is still at the way Mista just embraces him. Not that he can blame him. Slowly, he reaches out and just kind of crushes Mista against himself, his fingers curling against the back of his sweater.]
You're gonna wish you could get rid of me.
[But it's promise. If he has a choice, he's staying for as long as he can. Where the fuck else is he gonna go?]
It matters. [He doesn't explain himself, but it does matter.] I thought about that too, trust me.
Like hell I'm gonna wish something like that, not ever.
[ There was absolutely no containing himself after that, arms tightening around him even more as he finally let out a sob that he'd been holding back. ]
And I swear, I'm not gonna...
[ Oh god, how awful. Was he hiccuping? ]
...I'm not gonna go anywhere, I...fuck, what am I supposed to do now?
[ He'd been trying to live something of a normal life here, something that he hadn't really gotten to do back up but it was getting really damn difficult to even pretend that things were fine and that he was getting by. ]
[It breaks his heart listening to Mista like this. He places the flat of his hand to Mista's back, not at all revolted by his crying. Honestly, it's understandable considering all of the shit they've been through and the losses they've had to deal with.]
I don't know yet. I'm still trying to figure that shit out for myself.
But we're gonna manage and figure it out. And you got me. Okay?
[ He wasn't ready to let go, even if he did feel like he needed to wipe at his face like a sleepy child. Instead, he just rested there with his arms around Abbacchio and his chin propped on his shoulder. ]
If you figure it out first, don't forget to let me know, yeah?
[ He still felt empty on the inside, he thought of the word 'hollow' but that just made him think of Narancia again and what Giorno had said. It was a thought that was pushed to the back of his mind, shifting to rest his forehead on his shoulder as his grip loosened. ]
It's okay if I stay like this for a little, right?
[ Even if he was still pretty comfortable with his chin resting on the other man's shoulder, he nodded just a little and let out a thoughtful hum. ]
Yeah, lots of 'em...
[ He knew that right now the chroma was boosting his mood, that things would be fine for the moment but what was it going to be like once he got home? Once he was alone again? That wasn't something he needed to think about right now. ]
...Want me to stay over for a bit? [Because he definitely gets the whole being alone with your shitty thoughts with several bottles of alcohol scenario.] At least til you're sick of me or you pass out or something.
[ He finally pulled back, taking in a deep breath as he prepared himself to look Abbacchio in the face again. He will not cry, he will not be overcome by another wave of emotion. ]
I'll probably pass out before I get sick of you, though, I just don't really wanna be alone I guess? It probably makes me sound like a stupid baby but whatever...
[ Meant only in the best way, of course, lopsided smile on his face as he leaned against the bar. It was good to know that even if things felt awful right now, he didn't have to suffer through it alone.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Spoilers, Mista, lots of people would understand. That wasn't important, though, not as important as pulling his hand away from the other man and pulling him into a rather tear-soaked embrace. ]
...please don't leave me here by myself, I think you're the only one I have left.
[ There was a heavy pause, no concern about whether this hug was too long or whether it was appropriate. There was something else eating away at the back of his mind. Even as he thought about it he worried his lower lip between his teeth. ]
I don't think Giorno is ever coming out of that crystal, I know it probably doesn't matter to you but it matters to me.
no subject
You're gonna wish you could get rid of me.
[But it's promise. If he has a choice, he's staying for as long as he can. Where the fuck else is he gonna go?]
It matters. [He doesn't explain himself, but it does matter.] I thought about that too, trust me.
I'm gonna be here. All right?
no subject
[ There was absolutely no containing himself after that, arms tightening around him even more as he finally let out a sob that he'd been holding back. ]
And I swear, I'm not gonna...
[ Oh god, how awful. Was he hiccuping? ]
...I'm not gonna go anywhere, I...fuck, what am I supposed to do now?
[ He'd been trying to live something of a normal life here, something that he hadn't really gotten to do back up but it was getting really damn difficult to even pretend that things were fine and that he was getting by. ]
no subject
I don't know yet. I'm still trying to figure that shit out for myself.
But we're gonna manage and figure it out. And you got me. Okay?
no subject
If you figure it out first, don't forget to let me know, yeah?
[ He still felt empty on the inside, he thought of the word 'hollow' but that just made him think of Narancia again and what Giorno had said. It was a thought that was pushed to the back of his mind, shifting to rest his forehead on his shoulder as his grip loosened. ]
It's okay if I stay like this for a little, right?
no subject
[He lets Mista get as comfortable as he wants. Honestly, he doesn't care how it looks or whatever; they both need this.]
Yeah. Long as you want.
[Gentle pats to the back. He's got you man.]
Wanna take some drinks home?
oh shit this one got lost
Yeah, lots of 'em...
[ He knew that right now the chroma was boosting his mood, that things would be fine for the moment but what was it going to be like once he got home? Once he was alone again? That wasn't something he needed to think about right now. ]
all good happens to me all the time
...Want me to stay over for a bit? [Because he definitely gets the whole being alone with your shitty thoughts with several bottles of alcohol scenario.] At least til you're sick of me or you pass out or something.
you are an angel
[ He finally pulled back, taking in a deep breath as he prepared himself to look Abbacchio in the face again. He will not cry, he will not be overcome by another wave of emotion. ]
I'll probably pass out before I get sick of you, though, I just don't really wanna be alone I guess? It probably makes me sound like a stupid baby but whatever...
but i can be ur devil..............
C'mon. I'll grab a couple of bottles. I'll stick around until you pass out. I promise.
let me have both please but also do you wanna ftb here?
[ Meant only in the best way, of course, lopsided smile on his face as he leaned against the bar. It was good to know that even if things felt awful right now, he didn't have to suffer through it alone.
At least not tonight. ]